I have Arrived!

“…la vie est un magnifique endroit d’etre!”

As I sit here on a lazy Friday afternoon with my feet up in front of my wood stove, I can sense something special in the air. I inhale a deep breath of life. The smell of freshly burning wood on a crisp winter day reminds me just how special this moment is: Life is a magnificent place to be!

* * *

It was some time towards the end of June when I decided it was time to stop worrying about all of the doom and gloom and naysayers out there. I decided to let go of all of the fears and frustrations of the world, and I would just start living my life. And here we are almost 6 months later I am finally acknowledging and experiencing the transformation: I have Arrived!

I don’t want to give the impression that it has been an easy 6 months because I have gone through an inordinate amount of challenges, changes, and transformations. But on the other hand, I do want to convey that when you stop trying to catch up with life, and realize that you’re already here, life moves at just the right pace.

Perhaps it is enjoying “country living” that has helped me take more deep breaths and feel the energy of nature, but to be honest, I think that things have been moving in the right direction for quite some time, I had just been looking somewhere other than here and now. Yes, it is really just as simple as looking at all of the wonderful gifts that you have right here and right now.

I could share with you the interesting tales of the roller coaster ride that I have been on since June:

• How Shelly made the decision to leave her job at the hotel and we decided in the blink of an eye to move to Amherst.
• How we looked at houses and condos for one day before putting in an offer, which was accepted the next morning.
• How the actual home purchase and bank loan so seamlessly and effortlessly happened.
• How I had two jobs waiting for me without even looking for a job knowing that I would be unemployed at the end of October.
• How my ultimate Frisbee team ended up making the semi-finals at Nationals from the 14^th seed qualifying us for a spot to the world championships in Prague.
• How I have coached, counseled and supported over a dozen different people to begin to realize their visions in life.

And all that would just be the positives. I didn’t get into all of the rocky moments on the roller coaster ride; the moments that left me exasperated, frustrated, sad, and confused. I didn’t get into any of those stories, good or bad, because those are just simply the circumstances of life. Those are the fables that we tell every single day that cover up the real lessons that I think are much more important than the story itself.

And for me, this is a lesson that I have to keep learning over and over again. Perhaps it is because I am a slow learner. Or perhaps because every time I learn this lesson there is a small voice in the back of my head telling me it’s not true. The lesson is that I am. It sounds simple and if you take a deep breath and say it out loud “I am” you can even feel it. Try it again. “I am” Did you feel it? Try it one more time “I am” It feels pretty good, right?

It helps me get centered, grounded, and brings me right to the present moment. It doesn’t take me off of the roller coaster of life, but it simply lets me know where I am on that roller coaster. It brings me right to the edge of life…and then…the voice in the back of my head chimes in quickly telling me that this is not real. Why, you ask? Well, that’s very simple. When I acknowledge the here and now and when I live in the moment and when I inhale deep breaths of life, the voice in my head goes away, there is only the realization that “I am.” The small little creature that protects me from all of my fears, worries, and failures, also does a very good job of protecting me from living in the moment. Not because he does not want me to live in the moment, per se, but more because he wants to get a word in edge-wise while I am living at the edge.

So why is it that I have arrived?

• I have arrived because I am present and conscious all the time; I can enjoy every moment of nature and the world around me.
• I have arrived because I am courageous, I am fearless, and everything will be okay no matter what the outcome.
• I have arrived because I am excitedly in a loving relationship; everyday I get to wake up and smile and feel unconditionally in love.
• I have arrived because I am listening to the world and others; I get new ideas, different points of view, make new friends, and together we can make a difference.
• I have arrived because I am sharing my passion with the world; I get feedback and can adapt my beliefs; I can share who I am with more people and help others transform.
• I have arrived because I am abundant and making money is easy; I have everything that I want and can share my abundance with others
• I have arrived because I am prepared to live my passion, live my purpose, and help others realize their hidden potential and make their visions into realities.
• I have arrived because I am here to stay in the here and in the now.

I have arrived and…la vie est un magnifique endroit d’etre!

Seeds of Change

Over the course of your lifetime, you will receive millions of seeds of wisdom. You must plant each one in your heart to see if it grows. Each seed possesses the potential to grow. When it grows naturally, it feels right, and you know that this is the right seed for you. But you can’t force it to grow. It will grow or it won’t grow. With the right intention, the right seed will blossom when it is ready; when the time is right each seed will come to fruition. Be mindful that you encourage your seeds to grow by watering them and feeding them, but hold no expectation of the height of the stalks—they will grow to the proper height. And where will these seeds come from, you might ask? The winds of change will bring these seeds to you!

I have discovered that when I live my vision consciously, mindfully, and purposefully, a natural awareness of the aliveness of being becomes present both inside and out. The seeds of wisdom are blossoming and even the heavy snowfall cannot cover up the beauty of my garden!

* * *

I recently finished reading A New Earth: Awakening of Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle. I recommend that if you find the following discussion thought provoking or inspiring that you read it as well. Tolle pledges in the very beginning of the book that it will help change your life. I knew when I read that line that the changes had already begun, and that he was simply acknowledging something that I already held in my consciousness. Not surprisingly, my mother had bought me a copy for Chanukah and I stumbled across others reading A New Earth as well.

* * *

The purpose of A New Earth is to unlock the consciousness inside us all in an effort to shift the collective consciousness of the world to create a new Earth. Not a new physical planet, in any respects, but a new way of being, a shifted consciousness, and a new understanding of humanity’s purpose on this planet. By embracing the interconnectedness that we all share to the totality of life, the planet and the cosmos, we can begin to live our life’s purpose and in effect transform ourselves, our communities, and the world.

Sounds pretty good, right? What I found most interesting is that I have been reading a lot of literature and having a lot of conversations that have led me to the same fundamental understanding of life. The main premise of all of the information flowing serendipitously into my life is that we need to truly live purposefully, live consciously, and live mindfully, in order to live fully. There are no monumental transformations that need to take place, but rather simply, a shifting of the consciousness that exists now. In essence, each step along the way is the answer, and the sum of all of those steps is life’s journey. It is the extraordinary and the mundane, the micro and the macro, the parts and the whole. In order to live life fully, you need to truly be aware of the quality of your life, how you live your life, and why you live your life in every single moment!

And why is that so exciting as to warrant an exclamation point? Because I am living that dream! I am in the process of creating my own reality by evaluating the attitudes, judgments, and beliefs that make up my own box of possibilities. I have been living at the edge of my box of possibilities to really figure out what it means to live life fully and not just for myself, but for others. I want to help others become conscious of their life’s purpose in order to live life fully. And the more that I set out on this quest, the easier it is to create this reality. Every single day that I live my vision to bring more compassion into the world and to generate more compassionate relationships, I am able to make the world a better place.

And I tell you all this from a place of excitement and enthusiasm. I am not bragging or boasting, and I am not gloating in arrogance at what I have achieved. I am just stating the fact that living your vision will help you live life fully. Take a step back and ask yourself the simple questions: What does it take to live life fully? What is limiting me from living the life I want to lead? What are the barriers in my life to living the dream everyday?

And when you are ready to begin to answer these questions, I would love to have that conversation with you. I can tell you, very basically, that the answer is simply living the quality of life that you want to live. Even the mundane, boring, frustrating, and awful are absorbed into this quality of life when you accept that you are just living life. The bathroom needs to be cleaned, the dishes need to be done, the dog needs to be walked, the trash needs to be emptied, the test needs to be taken, the proposal needs to be written, the conversation needs to be had, and this list goes on and on. But what is it that ties all of these actions or needs together? That they BE completed! As long as you are BEing while they are taking place, then you can at the very least accept them. And as you accept them, you are able to enjoy them. And as you enjoy them you are able to get past the mundane-ness, boring-ness, frustrating-ness, and awful-ness of them to realize that they are simply things to DO and that you will always BE who you are. Get enjoyment out of the things that you DO in the present moment. There won’t BE time later because the time is now!

I am smiling as I reread that last paragraph because it seems so simple. Things are the way that they are. Go ahead, try to change that statement! The only way that things cannot be the way that they are is through your perceptions of the way things are. And once you are able to embrace that as a mental concept, you can slowly begin to understand the things in your life that work and don’t work, that function and don’t function, that make sense and don’t make sense. And once you begin to understand the things that work and don’t work, you can begin to transform those things that are not helping you live life fully and transform them into things that are helping you to live life fully. And as you begin this transformation you will realize that you are still BEing who you are, you are just DOing different things…and who knows you may find that you are DOing the same things, you were just not BEing who you are!

Just something to think about for now. When you’re ready to live it, you’ll know. And if you want to talk about it, I am here for you now, and will always be here now for you!

Where are you Big Baller?

I took a deep breath as I stood silently in the doorway. I stared with excited trepidation down the long hallway in front of me. There were at least ten doors on either side. I could make out the names on the glass, but that was all. I could not see what lay behind the smoky-tinted glass. Each name represented an exciting opportunity in my life—a different path to follow—and I simply had to choose a door. But how could I choose? What was on the other side? The doors read: Business School, Hospitality Consultant, Endless Travel, Unconditional Love, Buddhist Monk, Motivational Speaker, Youth Development Coordinator, Reunion Committee Chair, Spiritual Vagabond, Yoga Master, Elephant Charmer, Unknown, Power of One, and there were a few at the end I could not quite read. Surprisingly, I was afraid to choose a door. What if I chose incorrectly? What if it wasn’t what I was expecting? What if, What if, What it…

And so, I quickly darted down the hall and entered the first door on the right: Business School.

When I returned from my road trip across the country, I had aspirations of going to business school to get an MBA. I was excited. I had figured out the next phase of my life, and I knew how I would occupy myself for the next few months. But when I began to study for the GMAT and prepare to write essays and complete applications to different schools, I felt lost and confused. I could study for three hours or read about different curricula, but I lacked the passion and excitement of my friends who were also applying to business school. When anyone would ask why I wanted to go to business school, I was at a loss for words. I would literally stammer and stumble trying to articulate a coherent answer.

Obviously, I had chosen the wrong door. I may need the credential someday, but not now. I turned around and closed the door carefully behind me. I would always have the opportunity to go through that door again, but now was not the right time.

So what did I learn by going through that door? I found a series of new doors, some of which were the same as in the first hallway, but there were several new opportunities that now existed simply because I had made a choice to go through this door. This is one of the most important realizations that you can make when deciding a course of action or a life-path. You will never know if you’re on the right path until you make a choice! Once you have made a choice, you can determine if it fits or doesn’t fit with who you are and where you want to be. Until you have opened that door, it is simply speculation in your mind.

So I continued down the hallway and went to the third door on the left: Unconditional Love.

When I arrived to Boston, Shelly was eagerly waiting to pick me up. I think it was the first time in over two and a half years that I had nervous anticipation getting off a plane. I had been traveling across the country for the past month, and I was going to move back to Boston to live with Shelly, and we weren’t even dating! Try explaining that one to your parents.

“Does she have an extra bedroom?” “No.” “Are you sleeping on the couch?” “No.” “What do HER parents think of this?”

Well, needless to say, the past month and a half has been amazing! When you have been single for two years, it is very difficult to let go and open up completely to another person. You have to unconditionally place your trust, faith, and love in another person’s heart knowing that they are ready to do the same. It is comforting and invigorating, and at the same time, frightening and overwhelming. Fortunately, the last two are only temporary. Once you’ve overcome the initial love-threshold, you’re walking in the clouds. It’s truly a great feeling to be warmed from the inside out as you bask in love’s glory. It makes you happy to be alive! Makes you wonder why everyone’s not in love. Actually, we won’t tackle the relationship side of the coin, just yet, only the love side. I had clearly chosen the right door.

So now that I found myself in a new hallway with more doors, I decided I would take the third one on the left again: Motivational Speaker.

After deciding recently that I would not apply to business school for the upcoming year, I have been trying to figure out my next step. I have been trying to find something that would fulfill my personal vision and passion of: teaching others how to build productive, inter-developmental relationships; how to show compassion and understanding for others; and ultimately, how to use compassionate relationships to create a better world and global community. This was a vision that I came up with several months ago, which led me to give workshops with my father entitled Living at the Edge.

Recently, I have thought very seriously about being a motivational speaker for young adults in an effort to help them find their passion, personality, and possibility. I think that hearing a message from a peer would resonate very strongly with high school students, college students, and recent college graduates. Now is the time to realize that life is about discovering who you are, how to make difficult choices, and understanding how you can make a difference in your world! I have been developing an hour long presentation entitled: Who do you want to BE when you grow up? And the punch line is: You can DO anything when you grow up, but you will always BE who you are!

As I stepped through this door, I was in a large atrium. In the center, there was a large statue of a leaning Buddha stretching from one end of the room to the other. His golden arm pointed towards two immense golden doors: The Power of One.

During the end of December and January, I will be traveling to Thailand with my father and sister on a program entitled The Power of One. Ironically, when I agreed to go on this trip several months ago, I knew very little about the content of the program itself. I only knew that I would be working on an Elephant Nature Park and that they had a fantastic time on the trip last year.

Are you ready for this? The mission of The Blue Star of Hope, which is the organization running this program, is to, “foster global understanding and compassion, celebrate cross-cultural similarities and diversities, and promote a consciousness of peace and empowerment while supporting economic prosperity, social progress and ecological integrity for all of Earth’s inhabitants.” As a mentor for The Power of One, I will be working on an Elephant Nature Park, participating in service work in local Thai communities, and, most importantly, mentoring American and Thai High School students. The ultimate goal is to help these students learn the value of being global citizens by learning about how they can personally make a difference in the world. Could this be a more fitting trip to culminate the transformative journey that I embarked upon several months ago?

Over the past three months, I have truly tried to Live at the Edge. I have sought to define the edge of my personal box of possibilities, by constantly reevaluating my attitudes, judgments, and beliefs. I have made difficult choices to which I did not know the outcomes. I have experienced mixed emotions, faced challenging circumstances, and at times struggled to stay At the Edge. And in the end, I have realized that Living at the Edge will always make you feel uncomfortable, to some extent, because you are in a constant state of flux (or impermanence). Once you cross the edge of your box of possibilities, you have crossed a very important threshold. Things cannot go back to the way they used to be, and you have not yet defined the way things are going to be. Therefore, the way things are is frightful and fulfilling, fearful and fabulous! In order to sustain yourself, you need a solid support system, and the ability to see life with the right kind of eyes.

So, now, I find myself walking down an endless hallway with doors. I am slowly and methodically meandering down the path of life, while carefully tight-rope walking along The Edge. Truth comes in many forms as long as you live a purposeful existence. Compassionate relationships, fantastic experiences, and mystifying adventures present themselves everyday. You can DO anything that you want to do, as long as you remember to BE who you are! Live purposefully, Live mindfully, Live at the Edge!